


Holding On Tight

by hazzarat



Series: No, you're not to blame [2]
Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Catra Has Issues (She-Ra), F/F, Hurt/Comfort, POV Adora (She-Ra), Post-Finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:35:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25700707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazzarat/pseuds/hazzarat
Summary: “Is this how little you think of me?”She can’t help but say it, even though she knows that the words being spat at her are born of fear, she can’t help but feel their barbs as they pass by her.If she thought the silence before was bad, she had no idea the one that would follow now. It’s thick, the tension near visible.-Some fears are just too hard to comfort.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Series: No, you're not to blame [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1863883
Comments: 10
Kudos: 85





	Holding On Tight

**Author's Note:**

> Fic can be read alone but I'd recommend reading the other in the series so it makes sense!
> 
> Hiya! Just wanna start by saying that I hadn't any plans to continue this fic but I got a stroke of inspiration far too late last night and banged this out in one go. I hope you like it!
> 
> As always a huge thank you to my best friend and betas for all their kind words and help when writing these! Go check out their awesome works! [steviesbucks](https://archiveofourown.org/users/steviesbucks) [showzen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/showzen)

They wake up a tangled mess of limbs and blankets on the bedroom floor.

A beam of sunlight perfectly aimed to hit her just in her groggy eyes. She groans and bats at her face in irritation, expecting to hear the familiar snort of amusement at her misery.

It never comes.

Instead, she feels Catra freeze inside of her arms and slip away without a word.

She turns her head, rubbing blearily at her sleep-crusted eyes as she watches where Catra’s moving to. She’s not moving to curl into her chest as usual, nor is she sitting cross-legged at the end of the bed filing her nails into the sharp points she favours.

She sits at the desk by the window.

Those traitorous curtains are open, the light shining in framing Catra’s body like it’s something holy.

To Adora, it is. Had promised just the night before that she’d never let her go, would never leave her. 

“Good morning.”

Adora’s brow furrows, as she pushes up onto her elbows. She’s confused; the words are custom and have been since they got together but they’re accompanied by a flat tone that holds none of its customary fondness. Catra has yet to turn back around, staring straight out of the window into the palace’s gardens.

Still uncertain of how to react, Adora pushes herself further into a sitting position. 

“Catra?”

She gets no response. The tense line of Catra’s shoulders hardens further. 

“Catra? What’s wrong?”

“What’s it to you?”

Adora pulls back the hand she was holding out, shock mingling with hurt at the harsh words. Hurt at the even harsher tone.

“What are you talking about?”

“Nothing. It’s- It’s nothing.”

The whiplash hits Adora full-on, the confusion from earlier making its way to the forefront of her mind again.

“I just. Catra after last night-”

“Leave it  _ alone _ , Adora.”

Catra has turned around now, openly displaying her defensive stature. Hands gripping her own arms from where they’re crossed over her chest. The strap of her tank top slides slightly down her shoulder and the angry puff she lets out as she moves it back would usually make Adora smile. 

She doesn’t now though.

“Catra, what are you even saying?”

Catra’s eyes flare brightly with anger. With fear and her own unique brand of defence.

“I’m saying it doesn’t matter, Adora. I’m fine. Stop worrying so much, whatever  _ state  _ you saw me in yesterday doesn’t mean anything.”

The way she spits ‘state’ makes Adora picture the coals on a hearth or the centre of a star nearing its end.

It’s too harsh, too full of emotions that Catra doesn’t want to let out.

“You don’t have to worry. I’m sure these… less than pleasant things in my head will be gone soon. You’ll have your girlfriend back in no time, I’m  _ sure.” _

“You don’t mean that.”

“Don't mean what? Of course, I do! We both know you don’t want something that’s broken.”

Adora pushes to her feet, fists clenched at her sides and unsteady on her feet.

“You don’t  _ mean that _ .”

“Don’t tell me what I mean, Adora! I slipped up last night. I’ll make sure I don’t wake you up again. Then you won’t have to quiet me with platitudes.”

Adora stands there, speechless as she looks at the woman across from her. Follows her gaze down her angry brow, across the mismatched eyes filled with such fear and self-loathing she could drown.

The silence hangs for a beat too long and the wall of Catra’s shoulders begins to break, one brick at a time.

“Is this how little you think of me?”

She can’t help but say it, even though she knows that the words being spat at her are born of fear, she can’t help but feel their barbs as they pass by her.

If she thought the silence before was bad, she had no idea the one that would follow now. It’s thick, the tension near visible.

She watches as Catra visibly sags, her fight gone as her wall tumbles down.

“Is that-” Her voice catches in her throat as she stares straight at the woman she trusts more than life itself. The woman whose love had cleared a world. “Do you really think that I think less of you for having trauma?”

Her voice holds a slight incredulous tone now but she can’t stop the words flowing now that she’s started.

“Do you really think of me so low that I would think  _ less of you  _ because of nightmares?”

“Adora, I-”

“Do you really think I’m that sort of person? Really?” It hurts more than it should.

“No, Adora!” Catra’s gaze flickers between the spot above her shoulder and her cheek. 

_ Oh. _

Adora had all but forgotten the scratch she’d gained the night before, the pain hardly an inconvenience. Yet, each time Catra’s eyes flicker over the cut, the regret, the shame, in them grows stronger and stronger. 

Adora takes a step forward. 

“I know, I know that you don’t like feeling vulnerable but  _ Catra…  _ I could never think less of you for that. Do you know what an honour it is to be the one that you turn to? I would never,  _ ever _ , take that for granted.”

The hands Catra holds at her sides begin to shake, her eyes becoming glassy. 

“Adora…”

She risks another step forward.

“I meant what I said last night and I’ll say it as often as I need to until you believe it. I’m not going anywhere so stop trying to force me away because you think you’re a- You’re a burden! Because you’re not!”

The tears that had been pooling in Catra’s eyes choose that moment to overflow, forming rivers down her cheeks. 

She closes the final distance, holding out her hand steadily even as her heart begins to hurt. 

“I’m right here, Catra. I’m not leaving and I never will. Unless you want me to that is-”

“No! No… Please don’t.”

“Then I won’t,” Adora says with a final nod. She grabs Catra’s shaking hands and brings them to her lips, kissing them once before ducking her head to look her in the eye.

“Don’t push me away because you’re scared. I get it, but don’t take it out on me, okay?”

In a move that brings a strong sense of deja-vu to Adora, Catra throws herself at her, arms winding around her necks as she shakes.

“I’m sorry,” Catra whispers over and over. “I don’t think of you like that at all. I think you’re the best person I know. I just- freaked out.”

“We’ll work on it,” She says, kissing the side of her still messy bed head.

Catra clings tighter, claws digging ever so slightly in.

No one can hold it against her if Adora holds on just as tight.

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope you enjoyed it and if you did kudos and a comment would make my day. Sorry I've been a bit slow in posting lately but I'v had a very long fic in the works for a while so I can't wait to share. If you want please check out my other fics!
> 
> Feel free to send me asks on my tumblr [hazzarat](https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/hazzarat) with prompts! Thank you so much!


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